Today I am thankful for heartbreak. Now, you are probably asking yourself if I really just said that I am thankful for heartbreak. You are right. That is exactly what I said. I must clarify, though, that the actual heartbreak itself is not what I am thankful for – the hurt, the pain, the emotional upheaval – what I am thankful for is the character building that takes place through the process of dealing with heartbreak.
Like most of us, I have experienced heartbreak on multiple occasions and each time the circumstances and the process of navigating the heartbreak were different. During my first experience with heartbreak I spent a lot of time doing what most people do during situations like that – asking why the situation was happening to me, and wallowing in emotions of sadness, disappointment and depression. And when I looked back on the situation a few months down the line I realized that spending that time just allowing my emotions to overtake me did not serve to help me deal with the issues at hand, but rather caused me to solely focus on how I was feeling, which made things worse.
After experiencing that first heartbreak I did some soul searching and realized that I had been asking the wrong questions, and that focusing on my emotions made it harder for me to deal with the issues that needed to be dealt with. And the more that I gave myself over to sadness, doubt, depression and disappointment, the further away from peace and restoration I moved. Each heartbreak that I have experienced since then has taught me things about myself that I had not previously known. For example, I learned to ask questions like, “what am I supposed to learn from this,” “what is the next step that I need to take,” and “who can I help through this experience?” I have not had a lot of heartbreaks, but the few that I have had became easier to navigate because I had learned from the previous ones where to direct my focus, which was to God. That particular gem of knowledge made all the difference.
Dealing with heartbreak is something that is challenging, and it is something that most of us probably do not want to necessarily become good at. I mean face it, who wants to keep having their heart broken time and time again? However, it is important to know that experiencing heartbreak is not the end of the world, and that if you look at it as an opportunity to grow in character and learn about yourself, you may just discover some concepts that will help you to make better decisions in the future and possibly save you from having to deal with future heartbreak.
I am going to do something a little bit different today. I am going to close this post by asking my wonderful readers out there to share with me some of the things that help you deal with heartbreak. I look forward to hearing from you. #lovebythedrop
3 Replies to “Today’s Gem of Gratitude #16”
Therapy. A lot of people don’t want to admit going to see a therapist, but I don’t think its anything to be ashamed of. Sometimes your grief is just too hard to bear alone. And, my wonderful counselor was able to tell me things and make me delve into parts of myself that my family and friends couldn’t, and that I wouldn’t have on my own. She equipped me with skills that I now use as each new heartbreak comes along, making the pain easier to handle and the lessons clearer to see.
I have noticed that making the decision that you have made to seek counsel is one of the hardest ones that people whom I know personally have made as well, yet they all seem to share a similar opinion to yours – that making that decision to reach out for assistance and then following through with it was one of the best things that they have ever done. I, too, know the benefits of seeking counsel, and I am thankful for the ability to do so. I hope that more people will look to your example and to the example of others who have sought therapy and benefited from it, and realize that they are not alone in their struggles, and that seeking help is a good thing. Thank you so much for sharing your experience. I wish you the best in everything.